On February 23, I will officially release my first book: Genuine Kindness: Achieving Results through Trust and Understanding. Drawing on experiences and personal stories from my thirty-year career in HR, I have endeavored to outline a method to counteract the crisis of workplace incivility and improve the bottom line through better interpersonal relationships. I firmly believe that genuine kindness is the greatest strength a CEO or manager can embrace and exhibit in the workplace. In developing this work, I coined the term “genuine kindness” to encompass those traits that foster strength, compassion, and trust in leadership. When practiced, these tenets can lead to high morale and success in any organization.

Starting with this blog, in the coming weeks I will preview the four primary conditions that enable genuine kindness. These conditions are also the inspiration for the training module I have developed for managers and leaders.

The first condition of genuine kindness is self-awareness and willingness. If we don’t look objectively at our own imperfect behaviors, we simply cannot change. What’s more, we must need to want to change those behaviors. Leaders tend to be self-confident, which can sometimes obscure potential opportunities for improvement. Leaders must acknowledge when mistakes have been made, before striving to learn from those moments.

Take the case of the notoriously mercurial Elon Musk. As CEO of Tesla, Musk has virtually spearheaded a new industry, precipitating popular demand for battery-powered cars and prompting legacy manufacturers to produce their own electric vehicles. In this brave new world of fossil-fuel-free transportation, the company and leadership are bound to make mistakes. However, Musk has committed several notable gaffes that rocked the stock price of his company. His self-confidence may undermine his ability to be circumspect and avoid hasty announcements before seeking and receiving feedback.

That being said, even this ambitious, eccentric, superstar CEO understands the values of self-awareness and willingness. In a widely shared email sent to managers in October 2021, he pressed them to question his directions when uncertainties arise, listing three welcome responses to his orders:

  1. Email me back to explain why what I said was incorrect. Sometimes, I’m just plain wrong!

  2. Request further clarification if what I said was ambiguous.

  3. Execute the directions.

Whether such an email will truly prevent further turmoil remains to be seen, but for the moment, it counters the narrative that Musk is indifferent to feedback or insists on unilateral decision-making. Even maverick leaders must realize that isolating, willful behavior can undermine morale. For Musk, a healthy dose of self-reflection could be a powerful asset to complement his more easily accessible strengths as a business leader. If he continues along this path, he’s more likely to build trust among his employees and investors.

Make no mistake: There is genuine kindness in the ability and willingness to reflect on our behavior. Questioning conduct and considering self-improvement is not a sign of weakness or a lapse in confidence. On the contrary, it builds personal resilience and encourages loyalty. Your team, coworkers, and reports will come to realize you’re open to improving, collaborating, and taking the best path forward. My book and associated training module can help business leaders learn to consistently leverage this beneficial trait.

Stay tuned for more glimpses into Genuine Kindness!